Something Stupid

By : Sel-V -sel-v@plasa.com

I have been listening to the radio. There is my favorite song. “Something stupid” by Robby William featuring Nicole Kidman. I keep quite and I am still listening the music. I remember someone, someone who has made me fall in love. Who has made Azizah Falahme feel this strange feeling, until I don’t know what to do. But now he has left me…

I remember when I met him for the first. Actually, I fall in love with him since the first sight, what made me fall in love with him is that he doesn’t look like another the usual guy. He is different I like him so much. He is smart, patient, honest, and many things that make me more like him day after day I really want to make a conversation with him whenever we meet. But, I don’t know what have to say. I can’t speak English very well, I am so afraid to make a mistake. I am so shy to try it. What a lucky my other friends who has a very good English, because they can speak English very fluent with him, I am so jealous, but there’s nothing I can do. I only can see him from far away and still pretend that I feel nothing.

One thing that always disturbs my feeling now, that he has had a wife already. I know that my love is forbidden, I don’t have to think about him, however he has had a different status. I realize that I shouldn’t love him, however he cannot be mine, he has had a family and as far as I know that his relationship with his wife is still fine. I always thinking of him, and I cannot get him out of my head.

He is my English teacher, he is my favorite teacher, he is very communicative, friendly, and smart. He is still handsome and seems so fresh even tough his age around 32 years old. In my class he teaches English every Monday and Friday, before I met him. I never like English subject. I think that this language just for smart and famous people. Not me, I realized that I am not pretty, I am not smart and I am not famous. I am just usual. Until I meet him.

Today, he teaches my class, I feel so nervous. Last night I tried so hard to find and select the suitable words in order to be able to speak with him. I choose the right topic so I can make a short conversation. And now, here he is. In front of me, suddenly I cannot speak anything, no words I can say at all. I’m really nervous and confused what happens with me?

“Linda, what’s wrong with you? Are you sick?” he speaks to me softly, what a surprise! I only can say,

“What. What… oh.. No.. I’m all right, thank you”

“Your face is pale, if you feel that you cannot follow this class you can asking permission to leave”

“No… Sir, I feel ok, I guess I can follow this class” after that he smiles at me.

Oh… my God, he smiles at me…

The bell is ringing, that means the break time, all of the students go out of the classes, they seems in hurry, that’s because if they are late, they will not get some meals for lunch.

“Hai.. Linda…!”

“Oh.. ya, what happen Mr. Tio?” I said surprise.

“Why don’t you go out to have lunch with your friends?”

“I am not hungry, besides that I want to save my money”

“Why? You want to buy something?”

“Correct, I want to buy a new English dictionary and English conversation book”

“Oh.. you are a good student, and I can see that your English is good enough, are you a member of English course?”

“No.. I learn English by my self”

“Oh.. ya? Great. It means that you have a talent in English. You should try to speak English more often because it can increase your English. If you want to speak with me, just go ahead because I really like if you want to progress your self”

“Thank you Mr. Tio”

***

And the conversation between Mr. Tio and I is over. He wants to have lunch with other teachers. I see his smile to me. I’m really nervous but I’m happy now. However my friends shouldn’t know about this. I thanks to God because I have a lot of chances to meet him everyday. Since that day, I always thinking of him, I wish he could be my love. What a beautiful world is if I could be his lady, but suddenly I remember that he has had a wife, oh.. Why it must happen with me?, I cannot control my feeling again, I realized that love is blind we can fall in love with everyone even tough we have many different ages.

Today is Monday, I feel so nervous again, I select the right words to make some conversation with him. Hei.. There he is. I come to him and say.

“Good Morning Mr. Tio”

“Good morning, how are you today? You look so fresh, did your love come to your house last Saturday night?”

“Oh.. No! Actually I don’t have a boyfriend” I said that with smile and I surprise why he asked that to me?

“really?… you lie to me” he is laughing again.

“No.. I am serious, why don’t you believe me?”

“I was so surprised, you’re still young and pretty and I think that you should have a boyfriend, same as your friends”

“I have never thought about that, actually have or not, boyfriend is not effect my self at all”

“Ok, let me give you an input. Maybe you thought that boyfriend is not useful for you, but sometimes if you have a boyfriend, he can give you spirit, givie more attention for you, whenever you wake up in the morning, you will feel that someone else always thinking of you, need you, and loves you, whenever you look at the mirror then see your face inside, and you believe that you are pretty….”

“Hah.. Really?” once again I’m surprised.

“Ya.. You should know that, and I see that you have good potency in your future, I always have the student like you, they always talking to me what their problem, and I always give them some advices, and after that they feel better and confident again”

“Thank you, Mr. Tio”

“Oh.. ya, if you have some problem, you can talk with me, and I will help you to absolve your problem”

After that our conversation is over. I come back to my class and he goes to his office. I’m so happy even tough he has just said like that to me. But I think it was so special for me. I promise to my self that I will study harder and harder everyday to reach my brilliant future.

I have tried so hard to forget him, but I can’t. I really feel something stupid that I LOVE HIM. But from this moment I have to forget him. Willy-nilly, I should accept the reality. However, he is my teacher..

Yesterday, I got the sadly news, I heard that Mr. Tio has moved to United States with his wife. He had found the suitable job there. Oh, really sad I am. I will not meet him anymore. Yah.. This is the time for me to wake up. However, he has supported me. It was not his fault; maybe this is the great experience to me. Ok.. Mr. Tio I promise to you that I will never forget you and your advice. I promise that I will learn English very hard. Thanks for your support.

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